Wednesday, May 02, 2007

American Idol Top 6 Down to Top 4

Alright, time to get rid of two people. Straight to the results...

Except for the hour long filler.

I'm glad to see that Ryan found his razor. Antonella Barba is in the audience, and she looks like someone peed in her cheerios in the worst way. Either that or there are some more pictures out there.

Randy boos Simon, and when he does that, it always sounds more like a moo. I keep expecting him to bend over and chomp some hay off the floor. There's some more random commentary from the judges, Paula in particular. Then there's the joke about Simon's genitalia, which bordered on all manner of creepiness. Simon misunderstood it to be a slam on his girlfriend, and that just leads to a whole new level of awkwardness. Ryan swims desperately to the shore, trying to bring the show back around. I can only imagine the chatter on the production assistants' headphones wondering what the heck the talent is talking about. We used to do that a lot when I was a P.A. at ABC during the newscasts. Making fun of the anchors, particularly the shallow ones, made producing the shows almost bearable.

Seacrest does the man-on-the-street thing, and I'm going to cast my vote right now to eliminate this particular segment next year. Ryan found the most white-trash girl ever to sing Chris's praises by way of repeating everything she's ever heard about him from the Idol publicists word-for-word. Various other drunks and foreign persons are interviewed, and I doubt I'd want any of their support publicly.

We get to hear about Blake's mini-studio and mixing software. He plugs the mixing software he uses (wonder if 19 got paid for that) and then it's on to Jordin and her bad week. Phil's dad didn't let them listen to pop music. Uh-huh. LaKisha said she'd kiss Simon again. Yup. That baby of hers didn't come from the stork.

Ruben shows up and lets us know how we can continue to give back. I have actually really enjoyed his latest album quite a bit. Suddenly I find myself wishing for Season 2. Things were so much simpler then.

Melinda was hugely happy about being a huge part of such a huge show that hugely helped huge charities. Huge. Love ya Mel.

And it's time for a recap of the big fat Idol Gives Back show. Wow, that was one busy show. I'm sort of glad I didn't recap that one. Okay...the recap is running long...sort of done with it now... on with the show, please?

Time for this week's random guest performer. Because, you know, this show doesn't last long enough already. I just have a lot of difficulty taking Robin Thicke seriously, because he looks so much like his dad, Alan Thicke. I keep expecting him to stop singing in that ridiculous falsetto and start yelling at Kirk Cameron.

Fantasia is back, and she's helping promote the Idol Aid thing, which I thought was done, but I guess is still ongoing. That's cool. It's also cool to have a former Idol winner who doesn't mind showing up on the show every once in a while. I'm a huge fan of Kelly Clarkson, but I hate that it takes a huge charity bash to get her to show her face on the show.

Time for the Car-mercial. Oh yuck. The Idols doing "Paint it Black" like this is pretty much blasphemy. There's really no excuse for it.

Time for results. Melinda, Phil, and Lakisha join Ryan at center stage. Melinda, thought to be possibly in danger, is safe. My faith in America is restored. Phil and Lakisha are left, and I wonder if they might not both be going home. Guess not. Lakisha dodged another bullet. Phil is going home, and I think that's just a bit sad. He has had a wonderful past few weeks, but he'll be going home to the family. I'm not sure how best to explain it: Phil's chronic unpopularity, his early performances, Lakisha's voters rallying... whatever the case may be, there will be one less bald person on stage next week. I'm EVER so glad though that the exit song has been switched to Carrie's "I'll Stand By You" instead of the regular "Home" as performed by Daughtry.

I'm really really done with the American Idol "Challenge." You have to be "challenged" not to know the answers. Oh well, I guess that's to make it fair for the Fanjayas.

The back row gets to stand up, and Jordin immediately gets to sit down in repayment for her earlier stress-fest last week. Blake and Chris are left, and Chris will get to go home after Bon Jovi performs. Does ANYBODY suspect that it will be Blake? (Or could this be this year's "shocker" elimination?)

Bon Jovi will naturally be performing one of their newer sucky songs, because they've got an album and a tour to shill for. Good gracious, this song is slow and boring. Remember when you used to rock, Jon? Remember when you'd fly around the arena on a cable harness while wailing on "Living on a Prayer" or "Bad Medicine?" When did the rock and rollers of my teenage years turn into country/western and adult contemporary old farts? I think the band left their balls somewhere in a New Jersey cassette case on the dashboard and then let it sit in the sun. Yawn. Snore.

On to other commentary... do you suppose that since it is exclusively white males being eliminated that anybody will cry about racism? I mean, if it were oh, say, Fantasia, J-Hud, and LaToya, there might be articles written in major publications that can still be googled to this day. I've read more than one article on how racist Idol is during the past week, and looking at this final group of six, I can't think of anything more ridiculous than to say such a thing. I've actually picked up a few trolls (read: Lakisha fans) at my blog who have accused me of racism simply for not liking a particular contestant, despite the fact that I love Melinda and Jordin all to itty bitty pieces. You figure that out.

Dude, Taylor Hicks has lost some serious poundage!

Awww, Blake and Chris are totally BFFs. I think I might cry. Or hurl. For a while the show teeters on the brink of overt homosexuality, and then Ryan reels it all in, probably after years of practice. Chris, DUH, is finally gone. Thank you America for ending my season-long nightmare. And the hate ends here, as I support all Idols in their post-show career. So good luck, Chris. I wish you well. Just don't try the Justin Timberlake thing again.

All in all, I think I'll enjoy next week's show quite a bit more. Or not, now that I know that the Bee Gees will be a part of it. Twenty bucks says that there will be a group number next week involving the song "Stayin' Alive."


At 12:17 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great recap as usual!

Hey, I was wondering if you would go out on a limb and tell us your favorite songs in the songwriters contest? I would be curious since you know so much about music.

It is down to the final 20 songs. You can only rate a song once, 1 to 10 stars. Have you voted yet? Come on, what is your pick?

Now me, I am tone deaf, but here are my picks.

1. Love Me Till The Lonely's Gone
2. This Is My Now
3. I Saw Stars
4. Next Big Thing

Am I really tone deaf?

They tell you not to judge by singing etc...well, read it and do your thing, if you haven't already!

Thanks J.D waiting to hear! Also include your wife's favs!

Anyone reading this, add to the comments and let me know your favorite too.

At 2:48 AM, Anonymous boredoutof said...

It's funny you'd call someone else a troll. Since you look exactly like one!

At 7:31 AM, Blogger J.D. said...

Anon, I'll get back to you on that. Been meaning to get around to it, but I haven't had the time.

Bored, be honest, how long did you sit in front of the computer before you came up with that one?

At 12:04 PM, Anonymous Cleo said...

Well, well... We agree on a lot more about this episode than the last one. :D

I kind of like Seacrest's "man on the street" interviews. But the running thing he did (I think he was trying to imitate 1980's Bon Jovi stage antics?) was a bit frightening.

Robin Thicke was hard for me to listen to. I don't think any song should be sung in its entirety in falsetto. At least Robin's falsetto is better than Ace Young's, and even Justin Timberlake's for that matter.

Bon Jovi's new song sounds like it was written and produced by the same people who write and produce the schmaltzy, generic Idol winners' songs. Songs like that are the reason Gina cries in the night. I'm talking about the Gina in "Livin' on a Prayer", not Gina Glocksen. Although it's possible that Gina Glocksen cried after hearing that song. I almost did.

I think the best of the Top 10 still remain, but I wonder how Sundance Head, Sabrina Sloan, and Stephanie Edwards would be doing with all the additional experience and coaching that the remaining four now have. If you ask me, Sundance, Sabrina, and A.J. Tabaldo (am I the only one who remembers him?) should've made the Top 12 instead of Phil, Haley, and Sanjaya.

Best of luck to Phil and Chris in whatever they choose to do now. I think America voted correctly, but I also think Phil and Chris are good guys who deserve good things out of life.

Thanks, JD, for another enjoyable recap.

At 6:16 PM, Blogger Drea (Brownsoul) said...

What's good lil daddy?!

At 8:01 PM, Anonymous Mary said...

I'm not a Lakisha fan, but where do you get off with that crack about her kissing Simon? I'm a single mother myself, and I don't appreciate the way you talk about her like she was some kind of slut. It's cruel and stupid. I raised a wonderful daughter who is now at Stanford on my own. I got pregnant at nineteen. I was not a slut at all. You probably did a lot worse than I did, but your birth control didn't quit on you, right?

I understand you married a virgin so green she'd never been kissed. Good for you! A pity she'll never know what a great kiss or fantastic sex is like. Because just looking at you makes me doubt that you're aware of anything beyond missionary. (Now I'm aware that I know you'll now write something about how I'm stupid, or a fool, or whatever for calling you out. Go ahead if you're so juvenile.)

At 9:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks JD, I am anxious to hear your comments on the songs!

It is really hard to choose because you would choose a different song for different winners. There is one song, kinda country that I love, but I didn't include it, as the last 4 are NOT country!

The only CD's I bought last year are Elliott's, Kellie's and I am going to buy Bucky's. This year, I don't know. I just couldn't connect to anyone this year, I felt like I was watching a foreign show, not the same feeling. I do love Melinda and Jordin though! I think Jordin is more marketable, but I would love to have Melinda as a friend, so sweet with that great wit when you least expect it. Oh well, they all have deals.

Bon Jovi, I don't care if they sing "Mary Had A Little Lamb", I just want to look at Jon and Richie! If you haven't seen "Crossroads" with Bon Jovi and Sugarland it is worth your while, excellent!!!!!! Jennifer Nettles can really sing, right up there with Carrie and Martina!

At 11:31 PM, Blogger J.D. said...

Hey Mary, or whatever name it is you're using now, go tend to your crack pipe before it burns your whole slum down.

At 11:35 PM, Anonymous Mary said...

Ha! Thanks, JD. You just can't resist.

I'm certainly NOT a crack smoker. I work as the vice president of a large non-profit. What do you do to help the world? Nothing? Yeah. I didn't think so.

Hee. You idiot.

(Your poor wife and your unattractive body. Ick.)

At 8:59 AM, Blogger J.D. said...

Large non-profit. Sounds like unemployment.

Don't you get by now that I enjoy taking up so much of your OBVIOUSLY valuable time? Knowing that you come back time and time again and boost the ratings on my blog just tickles me pink :) Thank you!

At 11:14 AM, Anonymous Claire said...

People like Mary sure make the world a hateful place. I too was a single mom for about 7 years, having my first when I was 20.. (got me a wonnnnderful man now!) But even though I was there, I do NOT recommend it for anyone else. My situation was different since I didn't "sleep around" but many many other women do and then whine about how hard they have it now that they have a kid. Suck it up and live life is all I gotta say. JD I totally agree with you about Lakisha. She comes across as a ho from the ghetto. Don't let the dirty insults get you down! Mary's just jealous Priscilla got you first! :))

At 1:12 PM, Anonymous Mary said...

I make the world a hateful place? And there you are calling a woman a "ho from the ghetto." I'm still laughing at that.

If I want JD, please kill me now. JD is the fuggggggggggglieeeeeeeeeeesssssssst human being alive in my opinion. If Priscilla doesn't throw up a little in her mouth every time she looks at him, it's amazing to me.

And - getting more hits? Are you serious? Git over yourself. You're a loser and I'm sure you know that. Reality Television Convention. Hee.

As for you, Claire, you should be ashamed of yourself. How can you not see that it's hard for a single mother out there? How do you know who's a "ho from the ghetto" ? Have you met Lakisha? How would you know if she "slept around" or not? Nice way to have compassion, Claire. As I said, I'm not a Lakisha fan, I prefer Melinda. But I would never, ever talk disrespectfully of someone attempting to raise a child alone. It takes courage and it takes grit.

Why are the women always called "hos" and never the men who get them pregnant? Can you answer that?

At 1:48 PM, Blogger J.D. said...

Hey Mary,

You know that big huge corporation that you run? I'm thinking it must have shut down by now. Whatever you're vice president over must be running wild. Of course, you probably wouldn't know it, since you have all sorts of time to spend your entire day monitoring this and posting nonsense on blogs. Might wanna empty out that 401K there.

*Mwah* Love ya! Now excuse me, I have to go check my Technorati rankings.

At 2:12 PM, Anonymous Mary said...

Nice try, but I do get a lunch hour and breaks. :) My non profit helps provide housing and educational resources for single mothers and families on assistance. For a better future. So you can see why I take it personally when idiots like you get online and proceed to piss on their difficulties.

I actually work. What the freakin' hell do you do but insult single mothers? Hmm?

People like you are so sad.

At 3:40 PM, Anonymous Cleo said...

Sheesh, I thought this was a place to discuss Idol, not a place to debate social issues.

FWIW, I like LaKisha (on Idol -- I don't know her personally, although she comes from a town that's less than 20 miles from where I live), and while I'm not a pro-lifer, I applaud her for not aborting Brionne and for trying to do something to make both of their lives better by going on Idol. From what I understand, Brionne is with her immediate family, not in some foster home somewhere, so she is being taken good care of.

mary -- Insulting JD because he made jokes that you found insulting lowers you to what you believe to be his level, does it not? It certainly doesn't make you any better of a person than you believe him to be. And if you perpetuate this "eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth" attitude to your own child, and within your place of business (one that is supposed to help people, no less!), then I would say you're doing a lot more harm to the world than a guy who writes a blog to make people laugh.

At 4:45 PM, Blogger J.D. said...

Cleo, we wouldn't want to bog her down with the facts about the years that I've spent working with non-profits. I wouldn't want to burden her with the domestic violence classes I've taught, the work I did with emotionally disturbed children and youth, and the hundreds of drug-addicted people that I helped save from certain death in my career as a crisis counselor. Being a DJ has not been the only job I've had during the years. She probably wouldn't be interested in all the hours I spent mentoring at childrens' homes. Nor would I expect her to be able to recognize that just this past Tuesday I hosted a radio show that helped raise money for St. Jude's, the American Heart Association, the American Diabetes Association, and VH1's Save the Music. I wouldn't go into the dollars of my own money that I've contributed. It wouldn't affect her. She'd gloss over it in the same way that she glossed over the links on this very blog that ask people to help the Exchange Club Centers for Child Abuse, the Sarcoma Foundation of America, and St. Jude's Children's Research Hospital.

No, she's much better served with sweeping generalizations and hopping on a moral high horse and getting all indignant about a perceived insult immediately after she just called someone fat and ugly.

I like her, don't you? She's fun.

At 5:36 PM, Anonymous Priscilla said...

Hey Mary,

I have one word for you SHUTUP! There is only one thing you say on this blog that I will not tolerate and that is comments about my husband. If you want to discuss something that's fine, but keep the personal insults to yourself. By the way, I happen to think J.D. is cute.

At 9:26 PM, Blogger J.D. said...

Now ya done did it :) Ya brought out the redhead in my wife :)

Easy girl...don't bite her. She's probably rotten.

At 12:57 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh my, I just tuned in to see if you ranked the final songs yet. Yes, I was the one asking and waiting. I am curious to hear from someone who knows music.

But, it looks like I ran smack into a free- for -all with insults being thrown back and forth. Why? If you can't say something nice about someone, then don't say anything at all. It is not the way of God's children!

Btw, I loved the Lisa Tucker news, she is so sweet and I am happy for her new and upcoming FOX series. I didn't know she was doing one. I will have to research it to see what it is about!

OK, done with the hurtful words everyone?????

How about rating some songs instead?

At 11:34 AM, Anonymous Joyce said...

I agree with Priscilla. J.D. is cute. And on top of that, has a sense of humor like no other! I totally enjoy everything you write on your Idol blog, and not one time have I thought you were insulting. If you made fun of handicapped people or someone who had a birth defect or any mental/physical disability (single motherhood is NOT a disability), then that would be upsetting, but everything you write about Idols is pure humor.....some people just don't get it! I sure do, and I thank you for the laugh's you give me and countless others. And the rest that don't get it, need to lighten up!


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