Saturday, February 18, 2006

THE STARS GET WHAT THEY WANT!

I was checking The Smoking Gun to see if they had any mug shots of country music fallen star John Michael Montgomery's recent DUI arrest, but oddly enough (especially for them) they had nothing on it.

However, I did peruse a more interesting section of their site. It's been there for a while, but I'd never really delved through it.

This section contains copies of the tour riders for lots of popular acts. The rider is a list of things that a singer wishes or demands to have on hand when they perform a concert, and it's usually part of the contract. Failure of the concert promoter to provide these things can either result in stiff penalties or the performer not performing at all. Here are some of the most interesting ones:

Snoop Dogg: "Snoop's dressing room should have (1) complete Sony Playstation" with miscellaneous current sports titles. (Snoop plays Madden fo' shizzle dizzle.)

Paula Abdul: Dressing room must contain veggie tray with dip, fresh fruit, a gallon o apple juice, a gallon of fresh-squeezed O.J., a six pack of Perrier, a six pack of Pepsi or Diet Pepsi, hot water & tea bags, cream, honey, lemon, sugar, coffee cups, china plates, silverware, and six large bath sized towels. (How much is this chick planning on drinking? She'd be running off stage to pee every three minutes! Maybe that's what those six bath towels are for.)

Pantera: "To be placed in band dressing room no later than 15 minutes before end of Pantera show: Taco Bell order: 6 bean burritos, 6 bean burritos with green sauce and sour cream, 12 regular tacos, 12 soft tacos, 3 taco salads, a big bag of hot sauce (lots including fire sauce.)" (Do you get the feeling that it wouldn't be a good thing to be on the bus with Pantera after a concert without cracking a window??)

Eminem: Em wants a game room that "has an arcade type ambience such as video games, large television with playstation and games, a masseuse, ping pong table, and portable basketball hoop set up outside the dressing room area." (When was the last time you went to the arcade and got a massage??)

Jennifer Lopez: Bear in mind that the following were required by J-Lo when she was shooting a music video for a BENEFIT...a charity video encouraging people to send money to a cause: "45 foot trailer with triple slide-outs and 2 entry doors, must have CD player, TV/VCR, hair sink and make-up station; the room must be white with white flowers, white tables, white drapes, white candles, white sheets, large comfortable chair for hair-styling (no doubt white) and a white partridge in a pear tree. She also required mangos, green seedless grapes, cantaloupe, papaya, honey dew melon, watermelon, chocolate chip cookies, apple pie a la mode, brownies, vanilla ice cream, beans, rice, chicken, Cuban food, and Balance Bars (and you wonder where that big ol' butt came from!) To drink, she demands room temp. Evian, raspberry Snapple, lemon Snapple, and Ice Tea Snapple, Nantucket's Fruit Punch, and absolutely NO tomato, apple, or grape juices (not that she could consume what she already has within the course of one video shoot anyway!) She also requires yellow roses with red trim, white lillies, and white roses, as well as EXPENSIVE Diptyque candles. (Someone needs to hold a benefit for the poor video shooter. It probably cost more to involve her than they took in to benefit the victims.)

Clay Aiken: A whopping 10 page rider. "IMPORTANT -- One (1) meal must be prepared (for Clay) that does not have the following in it: nuts, mushrooms, coffee, mint, chocolate and shellfish." (Dang, guess those Chocolate Pecan Crab Cappucinos are out, huh?)

Ruben Studdard: I kid you not: A large bucket of KFC, and a fifth of tequila.

"Weird Al" Yankovic: The Weird One does not like Dasani for some reason. Also, he's a strict vegan.

O-Town: Despite having exactly ONE hit before everybody forgot about them, O-Town demands a police escort to the venue. "This escort must be empowered to route the vehicles through any potential traffic delay. Under no circumstances are the vehicles to be allowed to encounter any delays due to traffic." (Yeah, probably because whoever showed up to their show thinking it was the Backstreet Boys would get P.O.'ed and leave.)

There are plenty more of these to be read. Some are hilarious, but all are interesting. It's amazing what these guys can ask for and GET!

3 Comments:

At 9:01 AM, Blogger Kristin said...

I'm with weird Al in that I don't like DASANI water either... we drink FIJI in our household because, get this, the kids prefer it! What kind of madness is it when the 8 and 9 year old have a "rider" for the kitchen!!

JD, do me a favor and post a hello to my boys as they both wrote a little post on my blog and they will just be crushed if no one comments to them!

Thanks!!

 
At 8:33 PM, Anonymous michael said...

So what would be on your rider? Here's mine:

2 12-packs of Diet Coke

1 fifth of Jack Daniels (may substitute Wild Turkey - but please call first)

1 club variety sandwich on toasted wheat or sourdough bread - no tomatoes.

1 large sound system with audio in line compatible with fourth generation color iPod photo and iPod SHuffle.

2 1-gallon bottles of drinking water - sealed.

1 fresh veggie tray made no later than 1 hour prior to my arrival- tightly sealed and refrigerated, to be accompanied by 1 bottle of premium bleu cheese salad dressing.

i large high definition tv, accompanied with PS2 and NES system (I will travel with my own games).

1 masseuse on-call for the length of my visit. Ideally European, blonde, and who is attracted to overweight guys who spend a lot of time online.

 
At 12:53 AM, Blogger J.D. said...

Mine would be:

1 chicken and mashed potato dinner cooked by my mother (if my mother is not available, must be cooked by a mother who knows how to cook.)

1 case of Diet Vanilla Pepsi (cans.)

1 arcade style Street Fighter 3 game

2 cute girls to attend to my every need

1 large trampoline to unwind on before getting on the tour bus

Katharine McPhee's phone number. (Special discount performance if you actually provide Katharine in person.)

1 poster of Michelle Branch pre-pregnancy

1 ball-pen for artist and band to jump into and play in at any given time

 

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