AMERICAN IDOL 2006 NIGHT 2

Welcome once again to the only blog (that I know of) that gives you updated analysis of the A.I. competition in real time! Refresh during each commercial break to read new stuff. Stay Tuned!

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Time for the Denver auditions!

First thought: Why do so many rappers come to the cattle calls?

Marlows Davis, looking and sounding like Derek Braxton from last year, is the first person we meet. He's going to sing one for voice and one for dancing. He fails on the first one, though he plays great air trumpet. He looks really expectant, proving that delusion is much more powerful than reality.

Tiffany Christensen sluts it up with a Gretchen Wilson axe-murdering. News flash: sexing it up doesn't work if you're not technically sexy.

Olivia Dudley continues the streak with a Paula Abdul song which was slightly less palatable than the original recording, but only by a bit.

Crazy dude whose name I forget scorches our ears just for kicks.

Lisa Tucker gets a production piece, so finally we get to see some talent. I love that she's wearing just as close as she can to Carrie's audition outfight last year. This 16 year old has serious looks and major pipes. I remember her now from tons of the promos, so I have high expectations for her to go a long way. Her voice reminds me a lot of Vonzell. I agree with Simon that she's the best 16 year old that's come along. Wow, she's incredibly pretty when she smiles! Unanimous yes and she rockets into Hollywood! Mom's a hottie too! UPDATES: We have another former Star Search contestant on our hands. You can check her out at 13 years of age on her Star Search bio page. She didn't win. Idol has registered a URL for her via NETNAMES.

Back with more after the break!

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Simon pees a lot. Time for that prostate exam! Ryan gets caught up in some old school b-boy dancing or something like that.

Amanda Berg does a lot of flips and wants to be Whitney Houston, but will have to settle for being Mary Lou Retton. One of the few contestants I actually feel sorry for. First use of "appalling" for the day.

Brett "Ace" Young rocks a Westlife song. If he were any more breathy, he'd be on a respirator. He's not hideous, but not great either. Randy thinks he's the best one they've seen in Denver and gives a critique about falsetto. Simon thinks he's not good. Paula says he has great personality, meaning she wants to sleep with him later in the competition. Simon says yes with a miniscule Y. He's going to Hollywood. Yay. UPDATE: Idol has reserved a site for him via NETNAMES. Paula predicts that Ace will be this year's Constantine, and that girls will fall all over him. Is he the next Corey Clark? He's already had one single out on 2000's The Little Vampire soundtrack. Also, he already has a fan site online, something which helped Carrie Underwood win the competition last year (you Care Bears know who you are!) Thanks to MJ's Big Blog, an indispensable reference source for Idol scuttlebutt, for this info.

Rochelle Elaine brings her own fan group with T-shirts. She gets an extended interview, during which we learn she's homeless, so we get to pity her a la Regina Brooks last season. So I'm seeing a golden ticket in her future. Taking on "Chain of Fools" she proves my point. She's okay, but her stage presence is hideous. Simon likes her, Randy likes her, and Paula likes her. Call me Kreskin if you wish.

After the break, Constantine impersonators and possible drag queens. See ya in five!

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It's hard to wait for the next episode of 24.

Time for more pseudo-rockers. I know I'm excited. Or not.

Naomi Guise is not a rocker, no matter how much she wants to be sedated.

Jacob Garcia so did not do that. Somebody steal his crutches and beat him with them.

Chris Daughtry is a Bo-sycophant rocker-poseur living in the burbs with 2.5 kids. He does manage to sing Joe Cocker better than Joe Cocker does. Long production piece=golden ticket. I guess I kind of like him, but I'm more with Simon, who says no and doesn't think he's a solo performer. Randy thinks he doesn't emote, which in Randy-world means he doesn't pause long enough and say "dawg." Surprise surprise, he emerges with a golden ticket. UPDATE: Another Christian rocker here. Idol has registered a site for him through NETNAMES. Chris is a member of the band Absent Element. They've opened for Day of Fire, a popular Christian metal band fronted by the former lead singer of Full Devil Jacket. Here's Chris's bio from the site: " Hey, I'm Chris. I was told I could really sing when I was in 11th grade (I was 16), by my friend Robert. (I hope y'all have'nt been lying to me all these years). We had to write a song for class, so I forced myself to sing in front of him. I always enjoyed singing but never had the confidence that Robert gave me that day. We wrote a couple songs and I was hooked. I knew at that time, that's what I wanted to do with my life. He taught me some guitar chords and I took off from there. I've been in several bands but have never experienced the chemistry that Absent Element share. Though I've always enjoyed singing, I was never pushed until I was in a rock band. Therefore it took years to develop the strength and range it takes to deliver Absent Elements' screaming sound. My song writing comes straight from the heart. I write about my relationship with God, my wife (who inspires most of my lyrics) and other life experiences. If it did'nt happen to me, I can't effectively and honestly write about it." Chris's influences are Sevendust, Bryan Adams, Shinedown, and Chris Cornell. Check out Absent Element's site for song samples. Thanks again to MJ's Big Blog for the info.

Coming up after the break, Doogie Howser goes cowboy, and Einstein has left the building...

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Surely someone else will stand out soon...*looks at watch*....

Heather Cox is gorgeous, though we get only five seconds. UPDATE: MJ's Big Blog has a pic of her with Chris Daughtry that seems to indicate she has proceeded. Idol has reserved a site in her name through NETNAMES.

Another attempt at a Paula Abdul song by Angela Garcia. What's with this? Simon says it's better than the original, and he's not far off. By the way, Angela sucks.

Erik Mena is worried about Simon's critique, though he should be far more worried that his shiny head will be an easy target when we all start throwing rocks at him to stop his singing. And, cut!

Garet Johnson gets an interview and a production piece. So despite looking retarded in his cowboy get-up, the fact that his singing partner is a turkey, and looking like Doogie Howser in a ten gallon hat, he must be getting a ride to Hollywood. He murders Elton's "Can You Feel the Love Tonight." Simon thinks there's a good voice in there somewhere, Randy thinks he needs lessons, and Paula says no. Simon says yes! He's got to be hiding a crack pipe under the table. Randy likes him and says yes! Garet gets tonight's Dave Hoover award. He really isn't good, but he's going to Hollywood.

19 contestants made it to Hollywood from Denver Day 1. Up next after the break, a performance by Big Bird...

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NEWS FLASH!! LEGAL TROUBLES FOR THE BRITTENUM TWINS!!! My Memphis boys may have a shady past...more on that later...

Denver Day 2...

"Flawless" Nick McCord lacks no self-esteem, even if he does lack brain cells. He likes wearing jams and he's an entrepeTEUR because he cleans houses. I think he drinks bong water.

Ben Hausbach thinks he is ALL that. The inventor of the cosmic coaster is very proud that he has invented the first coaster that will spill drinks for you. The self-proclaimed triple threat seems to be expecting his Nobel prize any day now.

Thank goodness both of these minds get to meet, Adam and Dirk style.

Flawless has a flaw straight off as he forgets the words. I wish he'd forget how to talk. His fashion sense is better than his singing ability.

Nerdy Ben shows off his invention. Wow, the stagehand is buff! Ben slaughters a Wizard of Oz song. Simon wants to know what planet he came from. My guess is Uranus. Time again to blame the judges. He's gone and passes off the lamest proposal ever on Paula. UPDATE: Ben is caught lying about his patents. This according to mcp6453 on alt.tv.american.idol : "I did a search of issued patents at the United States Patent & Trademark Office, and there are no issued patents to any inventor with the last name of Hausbach. For a patent to be valid, it MUST list the inventor's name. It's the law. Therefore, it is reasonable to assume that 1) he lied about having five patents, or 2) he went to one of the invention companies who led him to think he was getting a patent when he really wasn't."

After I pee/after the break, more Idol coverage!

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UPDATE: The Brittenum twins have a criminal history. Not sure what it is yet, but I will try to find out soon!

Debbie Gibson still looks hot. Maybe I'll have to watch Skating With Celebrities anyway.

April Walsh wears a hideous floral print to hideously sing a hideous Bjork song. What else can I say? Hideous. For some reason Paula and Randy like her, possibly due to alien influences. She goes to Hollywood. UPDATE: April's name was registered by Idol, reserving a website for her name, so it's entirely possible that she will progress, as unimaginable as that seems. Also, she has a blog which is a bit sketchy and mostly password protected. I'm still not impressed. Also, April apparently had to audition twice to get in: once in San Francisco, and then in Denver.

So, more girls are making it than guys this year. Zachary looks like a girl, sounds like a guy. He's shocked that people think he's a girl, even though he has girl hair and wears chick clothes and sings songs like "Queen of Denial." Girl or boy, the sound still stinks. NEWS FLASH: Simon has pit stains. Clever usage of "The Crying Game" as background music. For some reason, American Idol is considered racist for eliminating a boy who looks like a girl... Contestant logic. Gotta love it.

18 others get to go to Hollywood on Denver Day 2.

ROUND-UP

Losers:
Amanda Berg
Tiffany Christiansen
Marlos Davis
Olivia Dudley
Angela Garcia
Jacob Garcia
Naomi Guise
Ben Hausbach
Nick McCord
Erik Mena
Zachary the Androgynous

On to Hollywood:
Heather Cox
Chris Daughtry
Rochelle Elaine
Garet Johnson
Lisa Tucker
April Walsh
Brett "Ace" Young

PREDICTIONS:

I'm only assuming Heather Cox got through, since she was only shown five seconds, but in a favorable light. Online scuttlebutt seems to indicate she made it. I don't expect Chris Daughtry or Rochelle Elaine to last through the Hollywood auditions. As for Garet Johnson and April Walsh, I have no idea what the judges are smoking this year. Neither of them will make it through the initial Hollywood auditions. Ace Young is going to get some mileage out of his looks, but he's not going to win. The only clear stand-out tonight is Lisa Tucker. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say she's a definite Top 12 contender, and based on what we see in the next few weeks, she may be a contender for the finale!

TOP DAWGS: Lisa Tucker

AMERICAN IDOL SCANDAL OF THE WEEK!! NEWS FLASH!! One of the Brittenum twins is currently IN JAIL. Terrell is being held for authorities in Rockdale Co. GA on charges of forgery. He was picked up in Memphis, released on bond, and then picked up on a Georgia warrant. Derrell also has a criminal record. Derrell is currently wanted on charges in Georgia including forgery, financial identity fraud, and theft by deception. Derrell will turn himself in to authorities either tonight or tomorrow morning.

KELLY CLARKSON CONTROVERSY IS OVER! This from MTV: Kelly will be allowing her music to be used on the show. All this comes after an acrimonious dispute which prompted attacks from Simon Cowell and Randy Jackson. Kelly has expressed that she's happy to hear her songs being used on the show that made her an overnight sensation. Rumors that Kelly was not licensing out her music to anyone were proven to be patently false, since Skating With Celebrities, the show that followed tonight's Idol, featured a Kelly Clarkson song.

Coming up next week, we go to Greensboro NC, the replacement city when Memphis was unable to host auditions. Simon's favorite Carrie clone that we've seen in all the pre-season promos and Michael Jackson Boy will show up. See you next Tuesday at 8/7c!!

UPDATE: Here's the entire text of the article on the Brittenum Twins in Memphis' newspaper, The Commercial Appeal.

'Idol' twin 'sings' from Shelby jail
His brother is on the loose; wanted in Ga.

By Chris Conley and Sherri Drake
January 19, 2006

If Terrell Brittenum watched his performance on television's "American Idol" Tuesday night, he did so from the Shelby County Jail.

Brittenum and his twin brother, Derrell Brittenum, both of southeast Memphis, appeared on the show. And both had outstanding criminal warrants when their performances aired.

They're charged in Rockdale County, Ga., with forgery, theft by deception and financial identity fraud.

The case involves the purchase of a 2005 Dodge Magnum in June -- allegedly by using another man's identity.

Terrell Brittenum has been in jail here since Jan. 10. His brother is still on the loose but is expected to turn himself in, sheriff's spokesman Steve Shular said.

Fox Broadcasting Co. spokesman Scott Grogin refused to comment on the twins, or their status as contestants.

"We do not comment on the personal lives of our show participants," he said.

The 28-year-olds' Chicago auditions were taped in mid-September and portions of the show have already been taped in Hollywood.

The pair made it through the initial audition.

Georgia's charges against the pair, who attended Hamilton High School, were discovered by accident during a routine traffic stop.

Memphis police chanced upon Derrell Brittenum Oct. 30 at a BP station at 2134 Lamar, according to the charges.

Officers ran the tags on the 2005 Dodge Magnum and found the vehicle was stolen, and that the brothers had arrest warrants.

Derrell Brittenum was arrested and gave a typed statement to police, saying he knew he was in a stolen car.

His brother was arrested Nov. 2 on a fugitive charge.

Terrell Brittenum had given his brother another person's financial information, allowing him to buy the $23,175 car in June, according to Georgia's charges.

Both men were able to bond out in early November.

And since they refused to be extradited to Georgia, authorities there got a governor's warrant for them to be re-arrested for an extradition hearing.

Terrell Brittenum has a Shelby County arrest record for traffic violations and a 2000 misdemeanor citation for disorderly conduct and indecent exposure. The exposure charge was amended to disorderly conduct and he paid a $50 fine.

Derrell Brittenum was arrested in 1998 for theft over $500 and in 2000 for contempt of court and passing bad checks, court records show.

The extradition hearing date hasn't been set.

-- Chris Conley: 529-2595

-- Sherri Drake: 529-2510